Does He Love Me | 5 Ways Your Man Shows His Love For You
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So he just won't say it...
Let's face it, most men just do not come out and say "I love you." It takes time for them to get those words out of their mouth. Saying "I love you" to someone not only increases the trust, closeness and intimacy in a relationship, but also opens up new doors of possible rejection and heartbreak. Men know this and because men tend to be logical straight-forward thinkers, they may opt to keep those risks to a minimum for a while. However, if a man loves you, he'll show you. Below are 5 ways men subtly show their love to their partner...without actually saying "I Love You."
He tries to fix your problems.
It is a mans natural instinct to want to protect what he loves and cherishes. If he loves you, he'll want to fix or get rid of anything that is causing you harm. If you share a problem with your man, whether directly or indirectly, and he wants to jump to your aid, then he cares deeply for you and your happiness.
(Personal Example) When I was student teaching in college and working full time, I got behind in my work. I had some papers that needed to be graded along with other projects. So when I called my now husband, then boyfriend of three years to reschedule dinner plans, he of course wanted to know why. His response to the situation..."I'll come over and grade the papers while you do the other thing".
He chooses time with you over his friends (sometimes).
Let me just say ladies, it would be totally unreasonable to expect the man you are with to always choose time with you over time with his friends, but if your guy loves you, he'll want to spend some quality time with you (and I mean quality time that does not involve a bed...yeah I said it). Spending time together is a bonding experience and believe it or not, men do like to bond (just not on the conversation-lets share our emotions level their women can sometimes be on, lol). A guy who doesn't care about your feelings or whether or not you think he is a jerk will have no problem blowing you off when he wants to do something else.
(Personal Example) When my then boyfriend's (now husband) friends called him up for a night of pool and drinks at some bar, he declined because he was taking me to dinner and a movie. Please keep in mind, I'm not saying that he always chooses time with me over his friends, I'm just saying that there is a nice balance. Does that mean he has never "rescheduled" dates with me...No way, but it doesn't happen often.
He thinks about you when he is not with you.
As I said before, he is not always going to be with you. However, when your man loves you, you'll cross his mind a few times when you're not around. Of course, you can't read his mind to know if he has thought about you or not, but there are some signs. For example, does he say "I saw this dress that would look good on you" or "Here, I brought you this (whatever it is) you like." If you get similiar responses, then your guy thinks about you when you're not around.
(Personal Example) When my guy came over for a movie night he brought the usual chips and dip for me (I'm not big on popcorn) and popcorn for him. He also brought a piece of my favorite cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory. He had went there earlier and wanted to bring me slice. Awwwww...how sweet!
He includes you in his future plans.
If your man has not said the three magic words, but has said these three words "us, we and our" when talking about the future, then there is a good chance he loves you. When a man includes you in his future plans, that means he thinks you are life-long partner material and more than likely, his life-long partner. Keep your ears open to these subtle hints; it's a good way to know where the relationship is going without actually having to ask "Where is this relationship going?"
(Personal Example) One Saturday, my guy and I were having lunch. Somehow the topic of family and children came up. I mentioned that I wanted two children. My boyfriend (now my hubby) looked at me and said "Really, well we are going to have to talk about that because I want 4 children." Wow! I thought "4 children", but then it hit me..."we", he said "we".
He introduces you to important people in his life.
Most guys will start with the friends first. Friends are important to a guy. They are like family but on a smaller scale. Guys care about what their friends think. If he introduces you to his friends or you notice that he brings his friends around when you are around, then he is beginning the "intro to people in my life process."
Next, the family. To most men mom is the "Queen." Mom is the prime example of what a woman should be. If it's not mom, then rest assured that there is some woman in his life, it could be a sister, grandmother, or aunt that he wants approval from. If he takes you around his family that means he is serious about you and is looking for that stamp of approval (whether he admits it or not).
(Personal Example) The first person I met from my boyfriends personal circle was his best friend (almost brother). Next, I met his aunt (he wanted his aunt's stamp of approval).
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Thanks dashingscorpio, I'm glad you liked it.
Hi Contrice, I loved it and so true what you wrote and I liked the personal stuff too, I hope that you are still with that guy because he sounds like a keeper!
Yeah...he is a keeper, Thanks dawnM
You expressed some profound truths here. I judged myself with these 'five ways' and the result was revealing. Need to work some more... Beautiful hub. And the personal accounts are nice too. Thanks a lot
Nice!
Well-written, Contrice!
Well written and excellent advice. voted up.
this guy i knw, he wont express much when we are apart, but somehow all his friends knows about me. he is very loving when we are together, but he never express his feelings to me, i dont know how to ask or tell him that i am in love with him, is he afraid of rejection? he pick fight with me and at times i feel he is trying to make me jealous by talking about other girls to see my reaction. what should i do?
Any person man or woman who is in a "relationship" and talks about other people is definitely trying to make you jealous for whatever reason. I'm a fan of honesty. You don't have to tell him that you're in love with him, but the next time he's picking a fight or trying to make you jealous, just ask him "what is this really about?" Bring what you notice to light and explain why you think its happening. You may have to open the door for him to walk through.
I am 21 and my boyfriend is 29, we are still new together. He is tall, big, educated, good looking and all.. He is always busy working, 6 days a week and we only meet once a week. We hardly even talk on the phone but he will make it a point to text me everyday, at least once or twice. He is a very quiet person and we have not met each other's friends and family. I think its because he is much older and would like to be really sure of me before introducing me to his friends/family. He works in F&B and stands all day, up to 16 hours. He is quite a smoker and has asthma. How do i get him to realise what he is doing to himself? We usually dont know where to go.. I dont want to make him walk too much, dont want to keep watching movies and eating, we cant meet up with friends coz well, not yet..
He also doesnt show much affection or be romantic and all..He tells me he loves me and misses me but sometimes i feel a little distant. Is it just me or? How do i tell him? What should i do?
Well written...i like it..
hello, this is karen 25 years old, single mom and i have a new boyfriend. i am having issues right now and it does have to do with my culture. i haven't introduced him yet to my aunt(guardian) so when they knew that i already have a boyfriend, they told my mom and dad about it( my family knew that i already have a boyfriend), and my aunt got mad at me. my question is, how can i still make a good impression to them with my boyfriend? and when is the perfect time to introduce him to them? my boyfriend is the best guy i have known and every girl could ever ask for. i know he would understand that this is a part of me and my culture, that my family agrees or disagrees with my decisions, and even dictate me for what they me want me to do? i just dont want him to feel bad about it. :(
Karen, I can totally respect that your family is imporatant to you and your relationship decisions. There is a good chance that if you like the guy then your family will too, especially if he is good to you. I'm no relationship expert but I would advise you to be honest with them. Tell them you have a wonderful friend who you would like them to meet. Sure they may ask questions---and you should answer them. Do it over dinner at a restaurant. That's always a nice, neutral, but relaxing environment. It intimate setting of a family table makes it seem personal and real while the surrounding of other people makes for less pressure. See what I mean!
Missy, sometimes the problem with older guys is that they've been there done that. The eight year age difference between the two of you is a lot. So much can happen in eight years. He may truely want to take his time, but if it's making you feel less than in a relationship with this guy then the issue should definitly be addressed. Anytime a guy wants to make things work with you, he'll work on the things that are bothering you...notice I said work on them not change himself completely. I'll recommend a book to you "Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man" by Steve Harvey...it's a personal favorite of mine.
Wow! My best friends boyfriend has all these traits..but the thing is i think i like him a tiny bit..and well all the girls in our group just cannot accept the fact that my bff is in a relationship.i'm a muslim and such things arent quite encouraged in our society..please please help mee!
Aisha, first I have to say, if it's your best friends boyfriend....BACK OFF! No need messing with a good friendship over a guy. Is your family more of the traditional Muslim or modern? I can't really tell you how to deal with your family, but I can tell you to live your own life for yourself. Keep some of the tradition and respect yourself and your families wishes (you know what I mean)...but what's the harm in dating and a dinner here or there.
i know...no one knows that i like him...actually i liked him first..then my frnd and that guys became great frnds and he proposed her! one thing that i know is if her parents get to know she is in a relationship they will change her school and take her cell and stop all means of communication with that guy
He is 17 years old & I'm 15 years old.he cares so much about me and he feels angry if I talk with other boys. And he feels angry if I go outside wearing sexy clothes He is my ex-boyfriend's friend. I told him " I love u" and he said that when he get in relationship he wants to be engaged and its too early for this. Our friends told me that he loves me too but he wants a time to say this. So how should I talk and act with him? I don't know what should I do
Sounds too me like he's a little controlling (which can become a lot controlling later on) and you seem to know it too. No man should ever tell you how to dress, they should trust that you'll respect them enough to dress appropriately (sign 1). Trying to jump into an engagement at age 17 is insane (sign 2). You already seem uncomfortable around him and are questioning how you should behave and what to say (sign 3) I wouldn't do anything, in may opinion there should be no relationship.
Contrice,thanks for every thing you wrote,i really appreciate it.bt i want to ask a question,what if am dating a guy before,and i meet another guy that loves me more than the first guy am dating,but sometimes,he's always busy but spare sometime for me,how will i gain his heart totally?thanks.
he never says i love you but instead picks a fight with me. So i avoid this but his always asking about me to my friends and tries to makes me jelous. One minute we are argueing and the next he cant take his eyes off me. He NEVA makes the effort to contact me, just once in a blue moon.
hey,i have a little crush on a guy but m not sure if he feels the same way for me.He is the chairperson and i am the assistant in class.So, when we were done with the discusion and i was about to get my bag he said casually in class he said okay,love you,byebye.The whole class heard it except me and when i only discovered this 2min's later when i asked my friend what they were 'woot wooting about'.The next day he asked for my number (when i asked my friend do you think he might like me she thought that he asked for my number just because i am the vice rap and he probably just need to check things with me).Another day he had told the girl that he wanted to couple-tee with me as we were wearing the same shirt.Yesterday,we had a very weird day as we both looked at each other at the same time a couple of times.Today, he didn't even look my way till the end of class.He refuse to help me with collection of work when i asked him but he agreed to collecting work as soon as the other girl asked him.He has also told me that he is still in love with his ex even though it's been 2 years since they broke up.I don't know if he likes me?i m confused by all this
contrice, pls helped me.
He does not talk to even totouch me not at all does this man love me or not wehavea eleven month old baby girl
dashingscorpio Level 5 Commenter 20 months ago
This is very true!
Excellent Hub.